Stories of Cloth

Aferdita

A Kosovo Wedding

In Kosovo all young teenage girls are taught to sew, embroider and crotchet and are expected to make most of the textiles needed for their marital home. I began to make my dowry when I was a teenager. It included a set of hand-embroidered white linen bedding to be used on my wedding night and at the birth of my children and lots of table linen.

Weddings in Kosovo traditionally take place outdoors in the summer months. Celebrations begin on the Thursday, when everyone helps to make dough for a sweet bread to be used later in the festivities. The men of the village gather, wearing traditional felted hats, and the girls sing traditional songs, accompanied by a large tambourine.

On the Saturday separate family parties take place at the bride and groom’s homes in preparations for the following day. On the Sunday the bride prepares to leave her natal home. The women sit around her and tell her stories about married life and then prepare her for her wedding. A handmade dowry is carefully stitched and on this day is laid out in a room for all the women of the village to see and admire the young bride’s handiwork.

The bride wears a long white dress or top, a blue ribbon in her hair to ward off the evil eye and a piece of red woven cloth. Her father ties a length of red thread around her waist and as the groom arrives to collect her, he asks him to take care of his daughter and welcome her into her new family. The red thread signifies her family bloodline and as she leaves her family home and gets into the waiting car, she breaks the thread to represent her leaving.

When the car arrives at the groom’s home an axe is placed on the ground. The couple passes over it and greets the groom’s family who are waiting at their doorway, where they exchange gifts. The bride shows her respect to her new in-laws, dips her hands in sugared water and marks the doorposts to show that she will always be sweet to them. A young boy takes the piece of red cloth from the bride and places it on the roof of the house. A flag is flown for 3 days to show that a new bride is in the house and that she is a virgin. On the following morning, if the bride is found not to be a virgin the red cloth and flag come down and the bride is returned to her family in disgrace.